...in which the most top-secret, mortifying events are chronicled for the benefit of the world.


archives:

 Friday, December 06, 2002
( 7:14 PM )
Dear World, Wow, someone just forwarded this link to me: Seven Deadly Holidays. It's hilarious! I agree one hundred percent. Merry fucking Christmas everyone!!! :-)

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( 8:39 AM )
Dear World, Guess what's weird? I just learned that another one of my ex-boyfriends from Ohio is a drummer in a cool band! What is it with me and drummers? Maybe that's why I am so into the tambourine, because I had so much rhythm in my early influence? Anyway I called my dad and he said that Billy called because he's going back to Akron for Christmas and was wondering if I'd be around. Oops! I hadn't even thought about Christmas! For one thing, what am I going to get my dad for a present? For another thing, I am not celebrating Christmas anymore because now I do the Solstice. I can get him a Solstice gift though. Something peace-oriented that isn't frivolous. I'll have to think. Anyway the point is that I haven't heard from Billy in years but he's living in Athens, GA and is in this band called the Dan K. Theory whatever the hell that means and he's the drummer. I have no idea why he thought of me after all these years, the only thing I can think of is nostalgia because the end of the world as we know it might be upon us at any moment (and I don't feel fine) and maybe he's feeling the need to say goodbye to all old friends. Which is a really good idea so I think I will go visit my dad for the Solstice time and I will look up whatever old friends I can find there and make sure we tell each other how much we love each other and all that stuff. Oh. Was someone expecting me to visit my mom too? Fuck that! I suppose that if I were a really good person I'd go be nice to her (maybe pay back the money she loaned me to go see my dad) and tell her I love her but I just don't feel like it and I think it is very important to be true to my feelings. Did anyone ever regret following their gut? I don't think so and my gut is telling me that Mom is still a bitch. If she wants to see me she can stop complaining about me and my lesbian wiccandom to all her friends and relatives. That would be a start. Then she can shut up about Dad. And then she can try to just be a normal person and then maybe I'll consider going to visit her some other time. It's not like she's having health problems right now or something. Or like I need anything from her. God I sound so callous, don't I? Maybe I should find a therapist to help me sort through this resentment that is suddenly becoming apparent. What's with this? Since when am I all obsessed about my mother? Yikes.

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