...in which the most top-secret, mortifying events are chronicled for the benefit of the world.


archives:

Monday, June 17, 2002
( 12:37 PM )
Dear World, I feel so out of control in my life. And like a fucking idiot! I have been avoiding dealing with Damian and worst thing in the world, I think I am pregnant really and truly because I still haven't gotten my period yet and I am eating everything in sight. And I am having weird moods. And I can't stop cleaning my apartment. Of course all of this could be purely psychological and I have been afraid to take a pregnancy test. Damian wants to know what's wrong. What am I supposed to tell him? If I tell him I might be pregnant with his baby he'll probably offer to marry me or something. So I have not been entirely truthful with him but it kind of works in my favor, I told him I think I am a lesbian. I thought he'd protest and say how could I have been having such great sex with him if I am a lesbian, but instead he just got all quiet and then he informed me that his last four girlfriends all left him for other women. HAHAHA! Ooops, that's not funny. Anyway for a lesbian I am really acting a lot like a heterosexual because I have been trolling for boys on nerve.com and "collect calling" them left and right. I have collect-called I think at least twenty boys in the last twenty-four hours. I was wondering why not a single one of them responded to me and then I realized that I haven't changed my ad and it still says "woman seeking woman" or whatever it says. I got one collect call from this girl in the North Bay who is 18 and I swear to god she is so fucking cute I could take her as my best friend in the world if I could afford to respond to her collect call. Her handle is "icantdothings." The problem is that I don't have any credits. And I can't get any because I don't have a credit card. And THAT is a story for another day.

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